Stalemate

Stalemate: video/performance piece

Stalemate Artist Statement:

I grew up in a very conservative and religious family. It seems as though my family used and still uses their religion and views to invalidate opposition to their opinions and sense of morality. As I have matured and reached a point of individuation that does not align with my family’s long-protected views, I have began to feel like the “opposition” that they seek to invalidate with their views.

On Easter Sunday, my brother engaged me in an argument regarding how my life goals to make art are going to be able to support me and create change. We went back and forth in what seemed to be a “match,” with each of us wanting to claim victory over the other. The argument ended with no clear victor as neither of us was willing to submit to the other’s views.

Growing up, my brother taught me how to play chess. Being older and more mentally adept than me, he would win these games with little to no difficulty, time and time again. It wasn’t until a few hours after the argument on Easter Sunday that my brother and I were discussing these memories and we ended up finding an old game of chess and decided to play. Once the game began I began to notice a certain synchronicity between the previous argument and the game of chess we were currently engaged in. However this time, over 10 years since we had last played chess, I won the game. And I won again, and again, and again after that. This exchange was the main inspiration for the piece.

I created a head garment for the piece to take the piece into my own personal context. The head garment contains a few key elements: the structure is a color of pink that I associate with higher self and realization. This color, juxtaposed with a thin sheet of fabric creates a membrane. Membrane is an important aspect to the piece and can be defined as follows: “a pliable sheet-like structure acting as a boundary, lining, or partition in an organism.” The rip in the membrane is representational of a window into myself, with only a small area of clarity and vulnerability. The head garment my identity as an artist and an individual.

I decided on the Nombre de Dios Catholic Mission as a site to perform my piece. The site is rife with religious content and is called “America’s most sacred acre.” By using this site as well as donning the symbolic mask, the setting brings myself, as an artist and an individual, into the territory of religion, a symbol of family views and lack of understanding. I created the frame so I was standing directly in front of a crucifix, a symbol of persecution. This use of symbolism is partially used to subvert religion while also connoting a certain sense of personal persecution in feeling that I have very few people on my side.

The framing implies chess or some sort of competition going on although it is unclear exactly what, much like it is difficult for some to understand my ambitions, but nonetheless there is a confrontation and a competition. In this performance, I am playing chess against those who I perceive as opposition. The piece ends with a revelation of the chessboard. This creates a relationship between the crucifix and the crosses on the chess pieces. This reinforces the concept of subverting religion, but it does so in revealing that I indeed achieved checkmate against my adversary.

Ultimately I decided to call the piece “Stalemate” because although the piece ended in victory, there is still an existential question mark for the viewer, and there is still a conflict that may or may not be resolved.